I also want to take this time to apologise to my followers who got to see me venting about my illness. I don’t like to vent often or too much, but thats where you end up in a horrible catch 22.
If you talk about it to your friends, you become a ‘whiner’ and a ‘complainer’ and sadly it happens that people push you away because of certain things: ie, less social, less capable, etc etc
But if you don’t discuss it, then it becomes invisible. It turns into something they can pass over like it doesn’t exist. It becomes ‘I wish I could stay in bed’ or ‘wow it must be nice not to work’ or ‘I bet you play games ALL day’ and the sneer of ‘lazy fucker’ ‘useless’ ‘worthless’ and then ‘nothing’.
I hate talking about it, but sometimes, some things need to be said. I don’t want to make any of you feel uncomfortable and I certainly don’t want to inspire… I guess pity?
I mean it sucks royally, but hey, I have this life and I will live it as much as I can do. All I ask is that you come along for the ride and see me for who I am, not what has tried to chain me down.
And for staying with me, I love you all from the bottom of my heart.
I finally had enough energy to unpack the new printer/scanner/copier/fax/toaster/god machine that I bought a while back. I’m looking forward to having it running so I can begin scanning in my copious volume of sketches to turn them into full artwork.
I also need a new standalone HDD to transfer my old art files to/use as an art file storage. I’m rocking somewhere close to 30 gigs of reference art, and a good 40 more of sketches and I dont even wanna think how many gigs my PSD and Illustrator files are eating up ;_;